When You Start to Let Go of Your Past, These 10 Things Will Happen

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We have all experienced the loss of something significant that has caused us great sadness and pain. Maybe you are holding on to a relationship you know in your heart is not healthy, hoping it will turn back into how things were in the beginning, before all the pain and hurt.

Starting to let go of your past in relationships, or anything significant, is one of the hardest things you will experience in life. We are comfortable with the known, and we will often choose known suffering over an uncertain future. We resist change and hold onto the past often long after it has quit serving us.

So, maybe you need a push to view letting go of your past in a new light. Below are ten wonderful things that will happen to you once you start to let go of your past.

Notice the phrase “start to let go of your past.” Letting go is a process that takes time. But the sooner you move through the process of letting go of what is hurting you, the sooner better days are to come for you!

1. You will realize a new positive version of yourself.

“I use memories, but I will not allow memories to use me.” – Deepak Chopra

Our brains are fascinating combinations of pure miracle, computer processor and organ tissues. But did you know that the memories that you hold are not necessarily all that accurate? Did you know that your memories can actually be altered and defined by you today? You have the power through what you choose to focus on to change your future. When we are experiencing a negative aspect of life, our brains scan the past looking for similar memories to match up with this, confirming the current negativity. That voice that says “You always end up in these bad relationships. Why do you always do this?” That comes from this filtering and matching process. Once you let go of what is hurting you, your mind and memories will work on creating a powerful new positive version of your life.

2. You will make room for the new.

“Some changes look negative on the surface but you will soon realize that space is being created in your life for something new to emerge.” – Eckhart Tolle

When you keep replaying the past you are forfeiting your present. Once you decide to let go of the past, however, you become  drawn towards new goals, new visions and new people that will lead you to an exciting fresh chapter of growth in your life. Our lives our not meant to be static. Change does happen for a reason, and the less resistance you create against change, more growth is available for you. Think of the process as a tree that has to drop it’s leaves and become bare. The reason the tree is stripped down to it’s core is the miraculous coming of Spring. New growth that is powerful, beautiful and necessary for that tree’s survival follows the winter. No, we are not trees. But we are living the same type of growth and rebirth cycle all through our lives. Embrace the truth of this, and come to peace with it. Think back over your life. How many changes did you despise at the time that you now can look back on with appreciation for how they helped you grow?

3. You will handle new obstacles with grace.

“The past should be a learning experience not an everlasting punishment. What’s done is done.” – Unknown

Once you move through a difficulty life has thrown at you, it will enable you to handle the next one with even more grace and ease. It’s a learned skill to let go of your past and move on. Think back to how difficult break-ups were early in life. If you’ve had some dating experience, the ability to let go and move on gets easier. Trusting yourself gets easier the more you experience it. Future change and more experiences that require letting go lie ahead guaranteed. The more practiced and comfortable we are with this process, the more we will grow gracefully.

4. You will learn to love yourself first.

We all want to feel loved in our relationships. But the key to feeling loved is actually to love yourself first. No amount of actions or absence of actions or words of another can fix a lack of love for yourself. We stay in relationships that are not great for us because we are searching for something outside of ourselves when we really need to be finding that inside ourselves first. Turn inward during this time of letting go.

5. You will inspire others.

Without even knowing it, you will touch and inspire others. When I meet smiling, kind-hearted, generous, tender souls that I know have gone through great loss, I am always awed in their presence. These people are proof positive that recovery can, and does, occur if you let it. When you let go of your past you will own that as a part of who you are and positively show others in your life how to let go with grace. Early in my life, I experienced an abusive relationship. I don’t enjoy revisiting those memories. But I do so if I feel it will help another in need and inspire them to think differently.

6. You will grow closer to your destiny.

We are all here for a purpose. Every experience, each hardship, every burden, even all our hurts have shaped and formed us into who we are supposed to be at this very moment. We are each here to balance out the universe in a very unique, and intricate, way that only we can fulfill. All of your experiences are creating the very fiber of your being, bringing you closer to what you came here to learn. Believe that each learning experience is meant to draw you closer to learning your life lesson. It is not necessary that we view each experience as positive or negative, but each experience is necessary for our growth to unfold.

7. You will naturally attract what you need.

“Abundance is a process of letting go; that which is empty can receive.” – Bryant H. McGill

The piece of your past that no longer fits in your life came to you at a time when you were a much different person than who you are today. Are you the same person now that you were ten years ago? No, you are a vastly different person right now. You send off different vibrations than who you were before did. Who you are now will naturally draw to you exactly the situation, the person, and the future that you need right now. Know that, trust in that and step into that in faith. What you need will come to you at exactly the right time for you.

8. You will realize that YOU are really all you need.

“You can only lose something that you have, but you cannot lose something that you are.” – Eckhart Tolle

Being in a blissful, supportive, loving relationship is wonderful, but do you really think that is the only path to happiness? Look around you. Who do you know who is not in a relationship that seems to have it all together? What do they do differently? They find joy in themselves, their interests, and build a life not dependent on someone else. There is a difference between love and attachment. When we become attached and dependent on another for our own well being and happiness that is not love. Love is without attachment and dependency. Love yourself as much as you love another, and your relationship outcomes will naturally become more positive.

9. You will grow in your empathy for others.

In addition to inspiring others, you will become more in-tune with other’s pain. When we ourselves have experienced pain, loss and disappointment, that enables us to see the same in others. You will have the heart to notice the young girl you work with who is in the midst of an unhealthy relationship. You will have the experience and empathy to feel her pain and to offer support. You have been changed by your experience into a more advanced, soulful person who now can help others with what you’ve learned. We are all here to help each other on this journey and lean on each other for support.

10. You will know in your heart what is good for you.

“Regret doesn’t remind us that we did badly, it reminds us that we know that we could do better.” – Kathryn Schultz

At the end of a relationship we experience things that just aren’t good for us. These can be things inflicted by others that we know are against our core values, or they can be things we put upon ourselves. When we don’t receive the love and support we are looking for, we can turn bitter and angry. When we hold onto grief, we can punish ourselves with guilt. We can only hold onto bitterness, anger, and grief for so long before we have to let go of the pain. We know these burdens are poisoning our heart, and robbing our soul of the joy it needs to thrive. So we must learn to feel what is good for us more fully. That is how we learn to go forward and do better, live better, choose better.

I would love to hear your insights as to what letting go has taught you, and any positive growth you have to share through learning to let go.

Featured photo credit: emprize via 123rf.com

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10 Things From The Bible You Can Apply To Your Work

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The Bible is one of the most important books in the world. It doesn’t matter if you’re religious or not; the impact it has had across the world makes it as much a historical document as a spiritual one. It even has some fringe benefits most people don’t know about. For example, there are a lot of lessons from the Bible that apply to entrepreneurship. Here are 10 things from the Bible that you can apply to work.

1. Control Your Emotions

Galations 5:23: Gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

Even though you certainly need to be tough in the business world, the Bible isn’t wrong that you need to be gentle, too. Don’t be prone to anger or you’ll be equally prone to turn off clients and co-workers. Self-control is a key to success in the workplace and pretty much everywhere else.

2. Don’t Get Too Cocky

Proverbs 16:18: Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.

People in positions of power are in danger of letting that power get to their heads. The Bible teaches us that such pride will only lead to an eventual, inevitable downfall.

3. Don’t Dread Obstacles

James 1:2: Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds.

Obstacles shouldn’t be feared, they should be anticipated. They’ll make you stronger and improve your life.

4. Hard Work Pays Off

Hebrews 12:11: No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

If it were easy, anybody would be doing it. You get skilled in your field and far in your career through hard work. The Bible reminds you that it will all be rewarded in the end.

5. Don’t Keep Waiting For The Right Moment

Ecclesiastes 11:4: He who observes the wind [and waits for all conditions to be favorable] will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap.

If you never take the leap to shift career paths or strike out on your own, you’ll certainly never soar. When you’re prepared and feel ready for the next step, don’t hesitate to take big strides.

6. Stay Mentally Fit

Romans 12:2: Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

If you don’t constantly test yourself and keep yourself engaged, you’ll fall behind all the people who want what you have or fall further behind those who have what you want. The Bible recognizes the importance of self-improvement; you should, too.

7. Don’t Get Involved In Shady Deals

John 10:10: The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.

Don’t resort to nasty tactics to get what you want. Do what Jesus would do and did do in the Bible: play by the rulebook.

8. Do What You Need To To Win

I Corinthians 9:24 NIV: Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.

While playing within the realm of legality and decency, you should be willing to take big chances so you can reap huge rewards.

9. Have People Around You That You Can Trust

Proverbs 11:14: Without the guidance of good leaders a nation falls. But many good advisers can save it.

If you’re only surrounded by sycophants, you’ll never get the feedback and criticism you need when you inevitably make mistakes. The Bible recognizes the uselessness and even danger of yes-men. Be brave enough to have successful people around you who will help guide you forward.

10. Have Courage

2 Timothy 1:7: For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

Courage is everything, whether you’re running a business or working for one. Be powerful in your convictions, in love with your work and extremely self-disciplined to get further in your career. The Bible teaches you that, among other things, we have a lot of potential. Don’t squander it.

Featured photo credit: Bill Bradford via flickr.com

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Take A Photo Of The Math You Don’t Know And This App Will Calculate It For You

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Math can get in the way of your dreams. Incorrect computations can cause you to fail your classes and even get fired from work. What if you could magically take a photo of a math problem and get the answer instantly?

Introducing Photomath, an impressive app that does exactly that.

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Point your phone at a math problem and Photomath will give you the answer. It also shows you the proper steps to take to arrive at complex solutions. Below are the supported features of the app:

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The Photomath app is a breakthrough for everyone. Students can cut their homework time in half. Furthermore, individuals don’t need to hire an expensive math tutor.

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Professionals such as consultants, engineers, and analysts may also find this app extremely beneficial. With Photomath, individuals can compute for data without relying on Excel equations.

Photo Math | Home

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7 Reasons Why You’ll Regret Not Having A Personal Website

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Whenever we consider the online revolution and the innovation of the Internet, we tend to focus on those that have impacted heavily on businesses. From development of accurate stock management tools to real-time communication applications such as Skype, we have marveled at the ideas that have driven commercial efficiency while also reducing costs. Just as technological advancement has helped small and medium sized enterprises, however, it has also enabled individuals to make money and achieve both their personal and professional dreams.

Why it is Easier than Ever to Create a Personal Website

It has never been easier or more affordable to conceive, design and create a personal website, for example, which can subsequently be used for multiple purposes. Service providers like SquareSpace embody this ease of use better than any, as their process only requires you to select a template and design theme before integrating images, copy and social media icons. You are then free to customize the website according to your needs, whether these relate to the organisation of your personal life or the development of your career.

With these points in mind, let’s take a look at 7 reasons why you should build a personal website:

1. Successfully Pursuing the Job of your Dreams

Above all else, a personal website serves as a window in which you can showcase marketable skills and connect with a targeted audience. This is best applied when looking for work, whether you are in search of gainful employment or simply considering an alternative career path. Simply by creating an engaging and informative personal website that promotes both your skill-set and unique characteristics as a candidate for work, you can connect with potential employers and establish an entry point for a productive professional website. You can even utilize proper SEO practices and optimize your personal website to make it easier for potential employers to find your details.

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2. Pre-launching a New Product or Service

On a similar note, aspiring sole traders of entrepreneurs can also use personal websites to pre-launch their new business concept, product or service. Such a site can serve multiple purposes, from creating awareness of your developing concept to executing pre-sales and raising much needed revenue. The latter technique was used successfully by entrepreneur Priska Diaz, who was able to raise $50,000 for her company Bittylab simply by pre-selling her air-free baby bottles through a personal website. Whether you aim to create an overarching brand or simply generate additional income, a personal website can be an invaluable tool.

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3. Imparting Expertise and Sharing the Benefit of Personal Experience

Increasingly, the online space has become a crutch to citizens who are in search of knowledge and information. This theory can be applied across multiple sectors, from the entertainment industry to the interconnected worlds of business and commerce. An estimated 75% of more than 57,499 U.S. adults surveyed and referenced products online before making a purchase, for example, while I myself used the Internet to reference advice when playing blackjack in Nevada last year. Personal websites play a huge role in successfully imparting expertise and objective opinions, as they can be established by individuals with relevant knowledge who want to share their experience. So if you have a wealth of knowledge and wish to help others or establish yourself as an expert in a particular field, a personal website provides the ideal platform.

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4. Store Memories and Photographs Online

Thanks to the development of smartphones and digital cameras, we are able to capture more joyous moments in real-time than ever before. This leaves us with a high volume of videos and images, however, and these must be stored securely if they are to be shared successfully through the generations. A personal website provides the ideal location in which to store your images, while also ensuring that they can be accessed at all times from your personal server. Publishing precious images on a live website also enables others to view them at their leisure, which in turn helps to create more interactive experiences that can unify friend and families regardless of their geographical location.

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5. Sharing an Image Led or Audio-visual Portfolio

From artists and photographers to freelance graphic designers, there are a number of people who make their living by creating visually engaging imagery. These individuals are primarily judged on the quality of their visual output, so it is crucial that they utilise a platform that adequately showcases their portfolio of work. Personal websites are ideal for this purpose as the vast majority of templates allow users to upload imagery and embed videos, while such diversity also enables them to customize their layout to minimize the use of text. Given that these websites also boast social functions, potential clients can engage with the artist through a number of mediums and develop a productive working relationship.

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6. Networking with Industry Clients and Creating a Virtual Business Card

Regardless of your pursuit or profession, a personal website can be used to assist you at every conceivable stage. This is especially true for young professionals who are looking to progress within their chosen careers, as a personal online space provides the ideal platform from which to network aggressively and liaise with relevant industry experts. In this respect a personal website can serve as a virtual business card, where interested parties can access your contact details and engage in real-time communication. If you also take a proactive approach to socially sharing the website and including it within the body of your email signature, you can improve your visibility further and establish yourself as a recognizable thought leader within your sector.

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7. Raise Awareness Surrounding a Charitable Cause

While we have discussed how a personal website may be used to achieve individual goals, it is important to note that it also has the potential to help others. As an online medium that can connect with millions of viewers around the world, it is the ideal platform from which to raise awareness of a specific issue or charitable cause. Modern design templates also feature fully-integrated payment processing technology, which means that you solicit donations and effectively raise funds for your cause. As individuals we all have charitable causes that touch our hearts in one way or another, and a personal website allows us to raise awareness and funds from a single, online space.

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How To Tell An Interesting Story In 4 Simple Steps

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Are you worried that your stories aren’t going over well in social settings? Do you see that hot girl you’re talking to check her phone every few seconds while you talk? Does the interesting guy you’d like to get to know better seem to detach mentally while you’re speaking? Do you have difficulty connecting with people you want to become friends with? Let this article help you learn an easy method for telling an interesting story. In four simple steps, you can connect emotionally with your listener, and draw them in to care about your story, but more importantly, to care about you.

Use this as a guideline, but please keep in mind that we all think our stories are far more interesting than others do. Unless people are always telling you how interesting and hilarious you are, try to stick roughly to the proposed sentence limits. The worst is to have someone walk away in the middle of your story with some vague excuse, because your story was endless and they wanted to escape the monotony. Far better to leave your listener wanting more.

1. Set the stage with no more than ONE SENTENCE of background.

People write about conflicts in the Middle East in one topic sentence in the New York Times, so you can certainly give only one sentence about why that woman at work went totally off the wall after her fiancee dumped her.

Example: “So, at work there’s this woman who was always talking about how awesome her fiancee was, and then he dumped her.”

2. Talk about how everyone in the story was feeling, and use examples that help your listeners visualize the incident.

People cannot connect to your topic unless there are emotions involved. Facts are not going to draw your listener in to your anecdote.  You must try to put yourself in the shoes of whoever you’re speaking about, whether it is Barack Obama or that woman at work. Use multiple emotion words here. No more than three sentences. You don’t want your listener’s attention to start wandering when you drone on.

Example: “She was devastated. She kept crying at her desk and calling her friends and crying to them too. She kept taking her engagement ring off and then putting it back on.”

3. Talk about how YOU felt about the incident and its relationship to anything you ever experienced.

Otherwise it’s like you’re just a reporter. Your listener wants to connect with you, and know what you think and feel. Three sentences.

Example: “I felt so heartbroken for her.  It reminded me a lot of when I got dumped senior year by my boyfriend of four years.  I wanted to curl up and never leave my dorm room.”

4. Conclude with the relevance of the story to whatever you were talking about.

Relate the story to both you and your listener, thereby connecting you and your listener even more. You want to express emotion here too, especially if you and your listener are sharing the same emotion. This is your last chance to connect here, so make it count. Two sentences, but hopefully you’ll end up saying more because your listener will jump in to share her own thoughts and feelings too. Then a conversation will be sparked, which is the real goal.

Example: “So really, it made me think of what you said the other day, that you’re lucky to be single right now and to be enjoying that phase of your life.  I feel the same way!”

If you keep these tips in mind, and practice a few times the next time you’re around other people, you’ll be telling an interesting story in no time. And then you’ll be beating off potential friends and dates with a stick, you social butterfly, you.

Featured photo credit: interesting story via huffingtonpost.com

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6 Lessons about Life That I Didn’t Learn in College

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There’s a lot of useful stuff you can learn in college if you’re the right kind of student, but it doesn’t teach you everything there is to know about life. There are all too many things that I didn’t learn in college, and you probably didn’t either. Here are 6 of the biggest shifts you’ll experience once you leave the college setting.

1. You don’t have a straight path.

Freshman year. Then Sophomore year. Then Junior year. Then Senior year. You do that on a semester-by-semester basis for four years, and then you’ve graduated from college. You probably didn’t learn in college how your path becomes a lot less clear after that. Even if you get a job right out of school (which isn’t easy nowadays) you’re still adjusting to that job, probably living in a new place and getting used to life without a GPA. It’s a whole new environment that you have to get acclimated to, and one that doesn’t come with any syllabi.

2. You can’t meet people as easily.

Once you and your friends are out of college, expect people to start moving away. What you didn’t learn in college is that once you’ve graduated, you and your friends are no longer congregated in the circumference of a school campus. Most of your fellow employees at your job probably aren’t going to be in the same age group as you, either. Life, at least at first, is probably going to become a bit lonelier. Over time you’ll build back up a group of people you can depend on and socialize with, but you probably didn’t learn the feeling of isolation that’s awaiting you in life after college.

3. You have to attend everything.

You can miss a class or two or ten at school, as long as you make it to your exams and turn in your term papers on time. You didn’t learn in college that that particular luxury evaporates once you’ve graduated. Your employer is not going to be okay with you missing a day of work, or even with you being late more than once or twice. You were rewarded for your perfect attendance record in high school, and benefited from it in post-secondary education. After that, it’s absolutely mandatory.

4. You can’t have any incomplete assignments.

Professors are sometimes willing to give you incompletes instead of Fs. You didn’t learn in college that you can’t expect that kind of lenience in the workplace. If an assignment at your job is due on Friday, you damn well have that project finished and polished by 5 p.m. on Friday. Earlier, if you know what’s best for you.

5. You won’t get new bosses every semester.

At least I hope not. Professors come and go. Even though people don’t stay at job positions as long as they used to, you’re going to typically have the same employer for more than a semester. That means you can’t risk getting on the wrong side of your bosses. Whereas spirited differences with professors are largely encouraged, conflict with your employer is almost always looked down upon. Make a good impression and stay in their good graces for as long as you stay at their place of work.

6. Success is defined by something other than a letter grade.

College, though complex, is in so many ways a simple thing. You get out into the real world for the first time. You make friends. You experience life to its fullest. All the while you find yourself getting a score from your professors at how you’re faring in school. You probably didn’t learn in college how to get a clear idea of how you’re doing. Even if you’re getting progress reports at work, you will probably never have as definitive an idea of what your boss thinks of you as you did in college.

Featured photo credit: Ralph Daily via flickr.com

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