1. Unhappy People
Tending to a wounded animal can be incredibly rewarding but it is also extremely dangerous and for trained professionals only. Unless you have a degree in mental health I wouldn’t recommend getting involved with somebody whose aura clearly says, “the world is garbage” (even then I think there’s probably a conflict of interest or something). You can’t fix the brooding boy at the bar or the angst ridden loner girl and you shouldn’t try. See if the person you’re interested seems like they have anything to offer. We all have problems, but if somebody isn’t interested in making progress with theirs you shouldn’t be interested in them.
2. People Who Haven’t Been in Long Term Relationships
I know, I know. Just hear me out. People who’ve made it to whatever age you are without a relatively long-term relationship should be covered in red flags. Why’d those other guys or gals split? Why weren’t they interested in building something long term? Sure, there are plenty of catches out there that have been unlucky in love, but they’re also very rare. Try and figure out what their issues were in the past and if they’ve been resolved yet.
3. People Who Just Moved Here
When people move to a new city they often make many new friends and relationships in a relatively short period of time. Their personal life is now in a vacuum and many new opportunities are presenting themselves, including you! It may be very exciting and fun to show a new person around your life and city, but just remember that this person’s life has just been through a major upheaval it is probably in a state of flux. They’re going through some massive changes; a big location change can do that. Be prepared for them to move on when they finally get their bearings.
4. People Who Are Leaving
On the flipside of the equation keep an eye out for people who won’t be around for long. This should be self-explanatory but often time’s people get attached very quickly when the person is suddenly forbidden fruit. Also, don’t move for a guy or gal if you’ve been dating for less than 24 months unless you’re truly all in.
5. Uninterested Parties
This is a doozy. People who play hard to get can be irresistible but there’s a difference between hard to get and actively disinterested. The date that doesn’t text you back and hasn’t rescheduled the appointment they flaked in should just be dropped. You can’t make people chase what they don’t really want. You never want to be on the end of a He’s Just Not That Into You speech.
You love the one who makes you laugh. It’s undeniable! But what are you laughing at? Don’t get involved with people who make jokes at others expense unless you’re ready for that hilarious-but-critical eye to be turned on you. How does your perspective love treat waiters or customer service agents? How do they interact with friends and coworkers? If their behavior has you flashing back to 8th grade lunch period just say no.
Being the smart one in the relationship can be very empowering but it gets old fast. What you should aim for instead is a partner who is a different kind of smart then you so you can look forward to teaching each other. Basics not wanted.
8. Shallow People
Never date anyone who’s just interested in you for your money, status, or appearance no matter what kind you’ve got. I know they’re gorgeous and they’re infatuated with you. That can be intoxicating. But their thrill at touching your juicy booty or getting into your circle of friends will be short lived and there’s nothing worse for ones ego then watching somebody lose interest in you. It’s not fair to either of you.